Bottom Boys 3.0

Bottom boys ain't got no style.

With this week's episode, Christopher has gone from being in the top three three times to being in the bottom three four times. Has anyone in the history of the show made that precipitous a fall, ever?

We were early supporters of the guy but with that many low showings - and worse, declaring each showing to be among your best work - we're left with the uncomfortable prospect that he's more of a dressmaker than a designer, at least at this stage.

Model: Matar Cohen

This? Doll clothes. Seriously. There's about as much design and detailing in this look as there is in the average cheap 6-outfit set for a Barbie knockoff you can find in the bargain bins by the register.

There's nothing there. Okay, yes. A belt. But that's it. That was the beginning and the end of his design process. Everything else wasn't just basic, it was practically invisible.

Technically, he did a decent job, but then again, we can't see anything here that even comes close to technically challenging.

It's just clothes. The kind of outfit you could put together for practically no money from practically any department store. That shouldn't be what Project Runway is about.

Personally, we adore the guy and we think he's made some very nice stuff both on and off the show, but we can't help thinking his trick bag is empty. He's going to have to pull out a major design for us to have faith again.

Um... ditto?

Seriously, we could just copy and paste the above captions and they'd be perfectly applicable.

Model: Celine Chua

At the sight of this ensemble, The Duchess flicked open her fan and reminded us why she's The Duchess: "They're clothes, they're not fashion."

EXACTLY.

There is virtually no sense of design or style to these pieces.

Like Christopher's belt, the only thing of any interest here are the suspenders and even they aren't exactly providing a focal point.

Exactly the same criticism applies: These could be picked up for nothing at a million stores the world over.

In fact, the more we look at these two looks, the more we think it was wrong of the judges to send Nicolas home. Sure, his look was off-concept, but at least it was designed. At least it had some detailing and a certain style to it. Lorenzo thinks Logan definitely should have gone home and Tom would have been fine if either of these two went home. All we can think is, if Nina had been sitting in that chair more often, these two never would have made it this far, with one boring outfit after another.

Extended Judging:





[Photos: Mike Yarish/myLifetime.com - Videos: myLifetime.com - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]


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The "You may leave the runway"s

We're exhausted, but we're never too tired to rip a bitch.

Okay, Gordana. Very shrewd. You knew we were going to rip this week's entry to shreds so what did you do? You sent us a very sweet email. Clever girl.

But we're still going to rip this dress.

Honestly, (and we feel a little bad saying this now) we were wondering what the hell her problem was this week. She had immunity, the only time in the competition when you shouldn't be stressed out, and she was stressing out like crazy. We tend to think she's not cut out for a competition like this, but she's still in the game, so she must be doing something right.

Model: Matar Cohen

Unfortunately, she didn't do anything right with this look.

Everything from concept to execution was an auf'able offense. First, why did she make what's clearly a red carpet type dress?

Second, dear God, what is going on with those cups?

And third, what is going on with, oh, let's say...EVERYTHING ELSE? Seriously, we're sorry to hear she was sick, but she's damn lucky she had immunity because this was a clear automatic auf. Even Shirin's dress was better than this.

Nicolas: "Irina is actually a really good designer. The only problem with her is that she's a bitch."

We know most of y'all hate her but we find her the one bright spot this season. Come on, we all know it's been pretty boring so we're thankful that SOMEONE decided to step up and be the bad guy. Where would Project Runway be without a little smack-talking?

Model: Celine Chua

Besides, at least she can back it up with solid work. Don't get us wrong, this was far from a winning look, but it was still a pretty decent effort.

Let's get to the criticism first: why she decided a coat was a good idea for stagewear, we'll never know. Sure, it gives her the option of a reveal, but the coat is so plain.

And the design is only so-so. It's well-made and appropriately body-baring and glittery, but it deserved its middle of the road status.

Still, unlike a lot of the other entries, it at least looked like something you'd see on stage. Unfortunately, that stage would be a soundstage on the MGM lot in 1942 and the wearer would be "chorus girl #17," tap-tap-tapping her heart out with 40 other girls in the same outfit.

Tim Gunn's Workroom Critique:





[Photos: Mike Yarish/myLifetime.com/msn.com - Videos: myLifetime.com - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]


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Team Delusional

Disco pumpkin, bitches!

Darlings, watching two of our favorite designers convince themselves they were knocking it out of the park when anyone with a set of eyes could see they weren't, well, it was like watching a slow motion train wreck.

It's weird. Neither of the pieces they produced looked at all like something either of them would have designed. Yet they were both so pleased with the results. We'll have to chalk it up to sleep deprivation. Because, honeys?

Model: Celine Chua

That ain't good.

Aside from the bib and the ruffled neckline, we're not seeing Christopher anywhere in this design. We took him to task for working too much in his safe zone, so we can only assume that he was making a conscious effort to move out of it.

Although to be more accurate, this isn't that far from what he's done before going by his entry in the maternity challenge. It's just a very bland shape and the fabric looks cheap and not chic or stylish in any way.

We don't get the Duchess's "disco pumpkin" remark even if it does make for a very quotable sound bite. He must have figured that his "disco soccerball" critique of Ari's first outfit was worth repeating. We look forward to "disco pomegranate" and "disco bowling ball" making their appearances.

Model: Tanisha Harper

Do you see Christopher or Epperson anywhere in this piece? For that matter, considering how style-less and done this look is, do you see any designer at all?

They hopped up and down in that workroom like they invented the idea of the shirt dress that looks exactly like a shirt. Newsflash, sleep-deprived: you didn't.

What can we say? The only bit of style they added - the sash - we don't like.

The rest of it is as basic as basic gets.

And the shininess of that fabric is not fabulous.

We've said this before about contestants who tout their self-taught capabilities and lack of formal training: that's all well and good, but there's more to schooling than learning technique. Design skills can be self-taught if one has the discipline and the perseverance, but you miss out on one important element of schooling: the critique process. And if you haven't learned how to go through that process...

...you wind up with this.

And then everyone looks at you like this:




Which makes you do this:

There's a lesson there for all of us.

Extended Judging:



[Photos: Mike Yarish/myLifetime.com - Video: myLifetime.com - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]



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Congratulations!

Uh-oh! Pocahontas won the challenge and the commenters are PISSED.

Last night couldn't have offered a better primer in the ways this show screws with the judging process. The most common judging fuck-up is one where the designers are given a challenge and then the judges decided to base their decisions on criteria that were never even mentioned to the designers. Were they supposed to design a workable costume for a film or were they merely supposed to be inspired by a genre? Who knows? The judges sure didn't!


In Nicolas' case, they judged him based on his costuming skills, discussing his dress in terms of how it would look on film and praising him for "working with" hair and makeup to create a look. Fine. No arguments there. But then they turned around and praised other designers for going off on flights of fancy and criticized still more designers for doing practical work. Color us two very confused bitches.

Model: Celine Chua

Which isn't to say we didn't like this entry. In fact, we have no problem with him winning it.


Oh sure, our sense of drama would have relished a smackdown since he spends so much time telling us how wonderful he is, but for once, he backed it up. This is a look that tells you a ton about the character at one glance and what more can you ask from a movie costume?


It wasn't shockingly beautiful or outrageously technical, but it did the job it was supposed to do.


To be honest, we can't point to any one thing and say "That, we love." It's all just alright. If anything, those feathers or whatever they are, look a little cheap and sloppy.


But it was the overall effect that won the judges over and like we said, that's something with which we agree. It DOES have an impact when you first see it.


Would it have been our choice? Maybe. Probably. There were looks on the runway that we felt were a lot more fabulous and better executed, but they failed on certain levels as movie costumes. Of course, some of those looks got high praise from the judges, so we're not entirely sure that even they knew what the hell they were looking for.

Let's say this: IF the challenge was to produce a movie costume, THEN this one is probably a clear winner. It's just kind of stupid that we don't even know exactly what the challenge was a day later.


Extended Judging:


[Photos: Mike Yarish/myLifetime.com - Video: myLifetime.com - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]


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