TFS: The Delusionals

You probably should've kept that measuring tape over your mouth, James-Paul.

"I'm very scared because I don't really work with real people."

Unfortunately Johnny, the imaginary people in your head aren't going to buy your clothes.

Then again, we can't imagine there are any real people who would buy this either.

Ugh. It's so boring and tasteless that we don't even feel like talking about it.

But if we must...

The basic shape of the dress is just that: basic. Basic for 1992, that is.

What bumps it up (or to be more accurate, down) from just "boring and dated" is the outrageously ugly and unflattering use of that upholstery fabric, which apparently wasn't enough for Johnny. He had to go and stick a thick, ugly braid around the whole thing.

To top it off, even though the dress couldn't have been simpler, he managed to completely fuck up the execution on it. Get a load of that zipper.

Once again, we feel the need to point out that the bizarre format of this show left this dress completely un-commented-upon. Even if the judges didn't think he should have been in the bottom, at the very least he should have been called on the carpet to defend this monstrosity.

And now, a word about James-Paul.

Prior to this episode, we had him pegged as a quirky, strange, but interesting and mildly talented designer who's more concept than practicality.

Turns out? Not so much. He's really just a dick.

"I am going to die."

"This is the death of James-Paul in this freaking show."

"I never worked with women that are differently proportioned. They are VERY normal. I don't do normal."

"She's like the epitome of American ready-to-wear and it's like super against my practice. It's like asking Jesus Christ to work with Satan."

It doesn't bother us so much when inexperienced designers say that they're not comfortable working with women over a size 2. Sure, it's a bit obnoxious, but that's the industry and that's how the people in the industry are trained. But comments like THAT? Completely out of line. We're sure he thought he was just being cute but he came across as a MAJOR asshole. And yes, one could argue that he was complaining more about his client's personal style than her size but we don't completely buy it.

Ironically...

The outfit's not that bad.

Mind you, it's completely wrong for her, but it's not a bad design, overall.

We like the blouse quite a bit.

The skirt, we could take or leave.

The problem is, he clearly never once took her own body into consideration during the process. Too big up top and too tight on the bottom to look good on her. Why bother saying all those obnoxious things when they clearly had no bearing on the final look? For all his talk of how hard this was going to be for him, he simply did what he always does and she never entered into the equation at all.

And use some fucking color, James-Paul. It's getting really old.

Over him.

Post a comment

TFS: More, More, More!

Butt wait! There's more!

Lidia:

Damn, girl. We said last week that you needed to really prove yourself after that last disaster and dammit, you did. You really did.

Loved this look. It's chic and more importantly, it's well fitted and executed, making for a very flattering look.




We have two issues with it. One: we don't like the back as much as the front, and two: we hate the colors. Pink and blue - especially THAT pink and THAT blue - is a bit too "baby shower" for us.

Anna:
What a sassy little day dress this is.

Great colors and great design, plus it's an impressive amount of work.

The only real issue?

The fit.

Had she executed the fit better, this could have been a contender.

Haven:
Haven LOVES the '80s, y'all.

"I love my butt."

This girl had a killer body. Great rack, tiny waist, full hips; the very definition of an hourglass figure. There's no reason for Haven not to have knocked out a fantastic look for her.

And while the dress is interesting and even fairly well executed, it's not a silhouette that shows her off to her best advantage. She is nothing but curves and that thick belt and poorly fitted skirt completely camouflage them

Can we just pause for a moment to point out that the hair styling and makeup on this show has been atrocious?

Back to the dress. Yow. Those boobs look a little dangerous. Okay, maybe it's not as well executed as we thought. She gave her dart nipples.

Like we said, it's interesting. The problem is it's not very tasteful and it obscured every good thing about this girl's figure. Worse, because of the length of the skirt and sleeves and that bizarre thing around her neck, it makes her look dumpy and all you need to do is scroll up to look at her before pictures to see the girl is anything but dumpy.

[Photos: Style.com - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]

Post a Comment

TFS: Highs and Lows

Merlin's tiny tie says, "Hit it, bitches!"

Yowza. That is BAD (and not in the Michael Jackson sense). The color, the length, the fit - everything here is wrong for this client.

"She thinks her hips are wide so I'm making an off-the-shoulder dress just to give her a very sleek long look."

From what we can tell, her hips look fine. Sometimes a person isn't the best candidate for assessing their own body. That's something a designer should be able to do. You name a body part and there's a woman out there obsessing over hers, but if there's such a thing as the Number One body part that women obsess over, it would have to be their hips. When a client tells a designer that she hates her hips, the designer should take it with a grain of salt and assess it objectively.

It seems to us that if there was any part of her body that needed to be taken into consideration, it was her shoulders. She's broad up top and there are certain necklines that aren't going to accentuate that in the best way.

Like this neckline, for instance. A great look for square-shouldered women is a halter and we can't help thinking that if this dress had one, it would have been immeasurably improved.

It doesn't help that Angel apparently forgot that this woman has breasts. The whole top of the dress is badly proportioned and terribly fitted.

And that belt/sash thingie is ugly and too complicated.

Gotta say, Reco knocked this one out of the park.

They never showed him talking to his model. We suspect that for all of his shade-talking, Reco is probably very good at dealing with clients. Since there was probably no drama in the interaction, we never got to see it.

Lorenzo does not love this look. He thinks there's a - as Nina would say - "taste issue" with a lot of Reco's work.

Admittedly, that top is perhaps a bit too clown-like (especially when she has the vest on), but the overall look was so well rendered and well designed that we both agree that taste is really a secondary issue.

Love the trim detail. You'd never know he whipped this up in a matter of hours.

Yes, it's super-tight (a little too tight across her stomach), but it really is a sassy little look and for our money, it was miles ahead of the frumptastic disaster that won this week.


What a disaster.

Chicken Diva, what has happened to you? All the promise of drama and well-made clothing that you demonstrated in the first episode has totally evaporated. Instead, you've been quietly producing one bad look after another.

This was just another in a line of big missteps for Merlin. Pretty much everything about it is wrong.

For one, the proportions on this look were terrible. The jacket was too heavy and too broad and the skirt was outrageously tight.

Look at her. That is the face of a woman in fear of organ failure. Or perhaps it's just fear that she's going to wind up splitting her skirt in front of a room full of people and cameras.

There was no reason at all for this to be so tight on her. We're confused as to how he could have been so off-base. Presumably, he took her measurements and when you take into consideration his demonstrated technical skills, it makes no sense that he would be so far off.

Okay, that's two down: proportion and fit. What's next? The fabric choices.

Kittens, that is some seriously ugly fabric. Cheap-looking and in ugly colors.

Even worse, the fabrics just don't go with each other. That houndstooth is nice, but what does it have to do with that skirt?

Overall, it's Merlin's worst entry yet. Step it up El Pollo Loco. Without you and Reco, this show is going to head straight into the toilet. We expect bitchery and fabulous clothes from here on out. Do not disappoint us.


[Photos: BravoTV.com - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]


Post a Comment