Darlings! She's coming back!

From Variety:

"HOLLYWOOD -- "Battlestar Galactica" exec producer David Eick is teaming with feature scribe Laeta Kalogridis to reinvent "The Bionic Woman" for NBC.

Eick and Kalogridis will exec produce a new take on "Bionic," a 1970s spinoff of "The Six Million Dollar Man" in which Lindsay Wagner played tennis pro-turned-superwoman Jamie Sommers."

This is FABULOUS. Sun-fried California hair! Fembots! Weirdly Elektra-like relationships with her boss and her doctor! Track suits! Fembots in Vegas! On-again-off-again relationship with cranky closet case former astronaut!The "evil" Jaime with the horrendous southern accent ("Thay'res only gon'be WUN Jaime Sommers naow!")! Max, the Bionic Dog!

Okay, not so much on that last one.

In talking about this post, a huge conflict arose in our marriage. You see, Tom wasn't sure if this post was going to be too close to our Wonder Woman post, revealing "I loved her, but not as much as Wonder Woman." To which Lorenzo replied "Oh no, I was a Jaime Sommers girl. She was fabulous and I wanted to fuck Steve Austin." Clearly, we've hit upon the gay version of "Betty or Veronica?" Sure, Jaime rocked those late '70s fashions and she could work that hair as good or better than any of Charlie's Angels, but Wonder Woman fought tough-guys-in-turtlenecks dressed like a tranny hooker. Do you think Jaime Sommers could fight crime in 4-inch heels or pilot an invisible airplane? I don't think so.

Still, even Tom can admit that she was a very close second in the Fabulous Ass-kicking Fems of the Seventies sweepstakes. We think a re-do is a fantastic idea and we're tickled pink(er) that they decided to skip Steve Austin and go straight to his better half for an update.

But wait, what's this?

"It's a complete reconceptualization of the title," Eick told Daily Variety. "We're using the title as a starting point, and that's all."

Poo. We had our list of potential actresses all lined up, but now all bets are off. Who should it be, gals? And what should the "reconceptualization" consist of? We'll start off at the extreme end of speculation and you guys can pull us back:

Jaime Sommers, a black lesbian transsexual, mutilated in an unfortunate spelunking accident, now fights Al Qaeda with her laser-shooting nipples and retractable helicopter arms, thanks to the timely intervention of the United States Government, who now owns her ass. Watch Jaime learn about her new parts while she fights America-haters and looks for a little place to call her own in this crazy world. This fall on NBC!

Okay, your turn.