Oh for God's sake, will you people LIGHTEN UP?

Jesus Christ, was that a makeover show or a hostage situation? Could this show be any more devoid of lightness and humor of any kind? One word kept repeating itself in our heads last night over and over as we watched this thing: dreary. We've resigned ourselves to the tear-filled endings on these things, but where's the sense of fun? This show feels like a physics lecture. In the immortal words of the Duchess, "Lighten up, it's just fashion!"

Plus, it looks like we really are going to have to sit through this ridiculously complicated "process" every single week. We realize that they have to do something to differentiate themselves from the other makeover shows out there, but we sat there last night yelling "JUST TAKE HER SHOPPING! THIS NECKLINE! THIS HEMLINE! THIS SLEEVE! BOOM! YOU'RE DONE!" at the TV.

Now let's talk panties for a second. While we think it's good that the show is driving home the point that a good wardrobe starts with good foundation garments, we think that whole "going through your underwear drawer" is unnecessarily humiliating for the client and we didn't blame her one bit for her meltdown. We asked a gal pal if she'd let Tim Gunn rifle through her underwear drawer on national television. Her response: "Hell, no! That's where I keep my vibrator! On the other hand, if it means I get a Catharine Malandrino dress, I might." Producers, we beg you, lose this segment. By all means, take her to a "bra specialist" (a job title right up there with "lactation consultant" for sheer ridiculosity), but don't make these poor women hold their granny panties up to the camera.

On another side note: Did every skinny gay Black man in America become a "runway expert?"

Speaking of skinny and gay, it was fun seeing Rene again but we were disappointed there were no ass shots.

Veronica's hair and makeup are still too severe. She looks like a prison matron - and for a makeover show host, her wardrobe ain't all that great, either. She and Tim still have almost no chemistry with each other. She doesn't seem to know what to say half the time and Tim desperately needs someone to loosen him up because the "prissy Professor" persona is not helping things. Bravo posted some outtakes from the show and it's a little distressing because they clearly show a Tim and Veronica that we're not seeing: relaxed, loose, and funny. Why was this stuff edited out? Take a look:

Click here to continue>>