The judges' reaction to this dress was one of, if not the, most overwhelmingly positive reactions to a garment the judges have ever had on the show. At one point during the breathless gushing, Tom turned to Lorenzo and said, "Wow. They are totally moist."
And rightfully so. Neither the pics nor the video do this dress justice. In person, it is absolutely breathtaking. On video, it tends to look heavy and ponderous but in person it has a light, wavy, dream-like quality to it.
It has a somewhat strange silhouette that still manages to be flattering and beautiful.
And normally, we would find that little flap at the bust distracting, but it's crisp and the proportions are just right, so it doesn't bother us.
They had absolutely nothing bad to say about this dress and their compliments were, as we said, breathless. At certain points, they seemed almost speechless. We can't think of any other time - maybe Jay's Chrysler Building dress - where the judges were so ebullient in their praise.
And if we were judges, we would be too. This is definitely among the top looks ever produced on the show.
We're happy to see she ditched the original design completely because that dress was heavy and overdone. It looked like some sort of air filter.
Leanne has an intellectual approach to design and someone like that naturally responds well to constructive criticism. It's notable not only that she took Tim's advice about her wedding dress...
But she also took his advice about shortening the length of the bridesmaid dress. The floor length hem takes the focus away from the beautiful bodice and makes the dress look bland in comparison.
Turning it into a shorter dress keeps all the focus exactly where it should be. We think this dress is equally as pretty as the wedding dress and unlike a lot of the entries (all of them, really), this looked to us like a bridesmaid's dress.
The only issue we can see is that the petal pleats in the bust look a bit sloppy.
We suspect she simply didn't have enough time to execute them properly.
And it looks like she played around with the design a bit before deciding which way they should go. We actually like this version better.
They don't lay correctly and it does some weird things to her bust. It looks like her right boob exploded. Still, this is only a minor complaint. We got the idea behind them; we just don't think she had the time to execute them perfectly. The judges didn't seem to have a problem with them because they never mentioned it.
And she didn't use the bridesmaid dress in her final collection (although one of the dresses had a similar skirt), so she must have been less than thrilled with the results herself.
Still, despite that, these two dresses really were breathtaking and really did look like they belonged in the same wedding party.
Ugh. We're so over this challenge. Let's rip through the dresses and get to the fun stuff at the end!
Lorenzo loves it, but Tom is bored. It's just alright. Not really avant-garde and as much as we love Judy's noodles (especially after her BP show), we think she may have returned to that well one time too often.
The back's nice.
Next!
Suede watched I Dream of Jeannie as a kid and thought it was avant-garde cinema.
It's lame, it's silly, and Suede should have gone home for this totally uninspired look.
Oh, it's also badly made.
Next!
Fucking ridiculous.
We will give her credit for one thing only: she understood that one way to approach avant-garde fashion is to really go to town on shapes and silhouettes. Unfortunately, the shapes and the fabrics she choose gave us an Evil Queen from a Disney movie. Bleh.
And if you're going to make such outrageously large sleeves, you should at least make sure you make them both the same size. Then again, delusion ruled the day with Veronica this episode.
"Looking around the room I'm not impressed with anyone's design. Mine is the only one that looks avant-garde. And I feel like I got this challenge in the bag."
Yeah. The air bag.
"I thought it turned out really cool."
"Ha. 'Cool,' she says. She looks like a goth clown. There is nothing 'cool' here, let alone avant-garde."
"Excuse me? I'm, like, young and pretty and shit? I think I know what's cool. See the flower in my hair? Cool."
"Oh please, Bettie Page. You wouldn't know 'cool' if it threw up all over you. Which, incidentally, reminds me somewhat of this garment. Vomit. A big plaid bag of it."
"Now, Nina - can I call you Nina? I know you're, like, Miss Fashion Editor or whatever, but I really don't think you get what I've done here."
"Oh, honey.
Mommy's face is still swollen, so I'll just sit here and let the other bitch handle this one. Michael?"
"It's INSANE! The whole thing! YOU'RE insane! I think it might be making ME insane!
INSANE!"
"..."
"Yes. I think we're done here."
"Stupid, lazy American cow. Telling ME I don't know where the boobs go. I fucking made my fortune off these tits, bitch."
[Photos: Barbara Nitke/Bravo - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]
Okay, it was wonderful seeing the divine DVF again, especially in a season somewhat light on the fashion industry insider type of judge, but did anyone else roll their eyes a little?
First, there were the designers themselves WALKING THROUGH A GIANT DVF and saying "We're in the meatpacking district?! Where are we going? I just don't know!"
Then we have DVF herself descending from heaven. We hear she nixed the wing idea.
Still, fabulous as always. We just could've done without all the silly staging.
And Judy Noodles knocks it out again! Stand back, bitches. This girl has found her groove and despite the nerdy, ren-faire-esque exterior, she's a hardcore competitor now.
We thought it was a lovely design. Simple and classic, with a twist. Said twist being the cropped jacket.
To be honest, though, it looks perfect without that twist.
The jacket seemed incongruous and strangely enough, it didn't look all that well made either. But when she took it off...wow.
It's not reinventing the wheel but that is a simply gorgeous dress.
We love the soft, sexy neckline, the high waist with the skinny belt and the looong form-fitting skirt. This could have walked right off an MGM set in 1939.
And yet, it somehow doesn't look old or costumey. LOVE the ruffle in the back. Elegant and visually interesting.
Honestly, she should've just ditched the jacket. It wasn't a bad idea, but it just didn't come off the way she planned it. For one, that fabric is probably too heavy for the design.
For another, the dress looked so darn good without it that we think the judges collectively decided to edit out the jacket in their decision-making. Lucky girl, that Judy Noodles.
Now, if you've got an Amex card and a hankering to blow 700 bucks before breakfast, you could always buy this gorgeous dress here.
It looks like they translated it almost exactly, too. [Photos: Barbara Nitke/Bravo/dvf.com - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]
That Saturn guy was a little minty, wasn't he? Anyone who can stand next to Tim Gunn and make him look like a big hulking slab o' man is quite the little will o' the wisp.
Anyway.
Kittens, we hear a lot of you bitch and moan whenever they do these "unconventional materials" challenges. We gotta say, we don't agree. Last night's show really demonstrates not only why these challenges are appropriate for a design competition, but also why they're golden for a reality television show. To wit: you get to see some stunningly beautiful fashion that really shows you who the creative ones are AND you get some godawful trainwrecks walking down the runway with the extra added bonus of a complete mental breakdown. Score!
So CONGRATS JUDY NOODLES!
Darlings, this was absolutely stunning. Her best work in the competition by far.
Look at that list of materials she used. You would NEVER know that she ripped them out of a car (unlike a LOT of the entries last night).
And it was gorgeously executed.
Her seam placements are just beautiful and they really draw the eye in interesting ways, effectively countering a highly unusual silhouette.
She really did manage to blow that girl's hips up to twice their size and yet still produce a beautiful and, in its own way, flattering silhouette.
This was clearly not meant to be worn by everyday people in everyday situations. This is FASHION with a capital F and sometimes, the look works not because it classically flatters a woman's body, but because it's so beautiful in its own right.
The other design element that really makes this look like high end couture was the pleated, fringed trim made out of seatbelts. GOR-JUS. PERFECTLY executed, they compliment the somewhat hard-edged effect of the leather. Just the right touch of frill without being too frilly.
Seatbelts! Crazy.
Little Judy Bernly's been struggling at the Xerox machine for a while now and it's really gratifying to see her come back into her own as a designer and a competitor. This look was so well done that we think it puts Leanne firmly at the top of the short list for Bryant Park.
When we grabbed our seats for the screening of the Shear Genius finale, the last ten minutes or so of PR was running on the screen - without any sound. It was infuriating seeing who was in and who was auf without being able to hear any of it. "He's crying!" we shrieked hysterically. "Why is my man crying?!?"
"Wait. YOUR man?!" And then we hit each other with our beaded clutches.
Fortunately, we ran to Laura's after the party and sat with her and watched the episode complete with inside judgery scoop - all of which will be revealed later as well as the story behind that picture with Nina. We are so good to you bitches.
Anyway, our poor Muscle Mormon had an almost Andrae level of breakdown last night. Except he acted a little douchey to boot.
This was sad. There's really no other way to put it. A sad sack.
"I'm more worried about what the judges are going to think than what I'm going to design and that's not a comfortable position to be in as a designer."
No, studly. It's a disastrous position to be in - and one that was entirely of your own choosing.
That's the thing with self-proclaimed self-taught designers. They've never been through a critical process and they don't know how to respond to it. Keith chose second-guessing himself and being a jerk to the people around him.
"Watch the breathing. Do not sit down."
Seriously? If you have to say that to your model, you're in deep shit. Not that he didn't realize he was in deep shit, but he tried his best to claim it was everyone else's fault instead of admitting he made a piece of shit garment.
We'll give him credit for one thing. Like Leanne's, he did manage to obscure the fact that he used car parts to make it.
Unfortunately, it was so poorly made and such a blah design on top of it, he would have been better off tying two headlights over her boobs and strapping a bumper to her ass.
Honestly, it was a little uncomfortable to watch last night. He really tried to do something outside his own aesthetic and totally crashed and burned. It's just poorly made, which became painfully obvious when the mere act of sitting caused it to come apart, and really poorly fitted.
Then again, Keith never did much in the way of fitted work and it's looking like he's not very good at it.
And WHAT the fuck is THAT? Was he hoping that the judges would only see the front of the garment?
Like we said, it was tough to watch last night. He clearly hasn't developed the tools to handle constructive criticisms - choosing, as he did, to characterize them as insults - but La Grande Duchess flicked open her fan and shut that down right quick:
"Guess what? You're going out there in the public, OK? You're throwing yourself into a situation that people are going to comment. You might not love the comment.You let it roll off your back and you get back to the next project."
Amen, sister.
But we don't care what you all think or how badly he cracked under strain, our hearts swelled to ten times their size when he bawled like a cute little musclebaby.
Or maybe those were our crotches.
Keith's exit interview:
More pics:
[Photos: Barbara Nitke/Bravo - Videos: Bravotv.com - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com] [Additional Pictures: Courtesy of Lisa Gilpin/Saturn/Rethink Design]
