Sarah Jessica Parker attends the opening night of "Mary Stuart" Off-Broadway at the Broadhurst Theatre in New York City wearing Balmain and Christian Louboutin shoes.
There's a long-standing belief about SJP (and one that we've stated often ourselves) that we now feel we have to challenge. Namely, the "she really knows how to wear clothes" line.
Balmain Spring 2009 Collection
Model: Eniko Mihalik
Because bitches? If she "really knows how to wear clothes," then she wouldn't have worn THAT jacket in THAT manner over a top that barely seems to fit her and then to top (or bottom) it all off, put on THOSE shoes.
We love that jacket, but because of the way it's constructed, it's not something you can drape over your shoulders and expect to get away with . Something as structural as that can only be worn in the manner in which it was intended, otherwise you completely fuck up the lines of the thing. Someone who "really knows how to wear clothes" would know that. And what the hell is going on in her boob area? How can you look at yourself in the mirror, wearing that, and not say, "Oh, this doesn't fit. Let me put something else on."
The shoes are kinda fabulous but they're just totally wrong for that outfit. When you look at her, your eyes just go nuts, not knowing where to focus: "What's with her shoulders? What's with her boobs? What's with her feet?" Not a good effect, kittens and DEFINITELY not the result of someone who "really knows how to wear clothes."
Big ol' O to the U.T.
[Photos: Getty Images/WireImage]
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