Go Straight Boy!

Darlings, we have a confession to make.

We want to fuck Varla Jean Merman.

Is that so wrong? Look at him! Her! Him!

We have spent the night coming to terms with our newfound attraction to drag queens and we're happy to inform you that we're okay with it. So long as they look like that.

The rest of them, not so much.

But ohmigod, how FUN was that episode? There's no denying that they were the most fabulous, most bitchy and most be-sequin'd group of clients the show's ever had. In fact, we propose that in the wake of Project Runway's impending departure from the network, Bravo should develop a drag version of the show to take its place. Project Dragway. A drag Heidi, a drag Nina and a drag king Tim. No need for a drag version of Michael Kors since it would be pretty much redundant.

And how fun to see SissyBear again. He seemed a little off on the runway but his critiques in the workroom were dead on.

"Ohmigod, I'm so scared right now."

"Just don't make me look like your daughter and you'll get out of this with your balls intact."

We have to say, we were really pleased to see that Joe won it. We know some of you are thinking that Terri got robbed again and we can see why people would think that, but in our opinion, Joe really nailed it and deserves a lot of credit for working so far outside his comfort zone.

It wasn't the most original drag look ever attempted, but it was absolutely perfect for Varla Jean.

In a way, that was really smart. So many other designers were trying to go as over the top as they could imagine and while there's nothing wrong with that approach, for this drag queen, simple was the best way to go.

And we mean "simple" in relation to drag attire. Obviously, there's nothing understated about a pink sequined sailor jumpsuit on a seven-foot man with linebacker shoulders.

Now, you could argue that Joe lucked out because Varla Jean came in and recommended some changes. And thank god she did, because it was getting too close to Elvis with that stand-up collar. It looked to us like Varla Jean came up with the sailor suit idea and Joe ran with it.

And you know what? Good for him. That's called "listening to your client" and we can't fault him one bit for that.

And for someone who had trouble fitting his model last week, well....apparently Joe's more comfortable stretching fabric tightly across a perky male ass. That's all we're sayin'.

That "Nina, stop!" just killed us. And the earrings! We doubt they came off the Bluefly accessories wall.

So yes, Joe also lucked out that this-seven foot Barbie came with her own accessories (and we don't mean a penis).

Speaking of which, that hide-the-candy belt was ingenious and looked fabulous. The only critique? That zipper looks a little sloppy.

The end.


More of Varla Jean Merman, for those who might not be familiar with her:

[Photos: Barbara Nitke/Bravo/varlaonline.com - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]