Darlings, at the end of the show last night, we leapt out of our seats and uttered three words in unison. Loudly.
"This.
Is.
BULLSHIT!"
Of course, Tom, being the good little Irish Catholic boy, calmed down immediately, but Lorenzo, being the fiery, hot-headed latin, was awake for HOURS, angrily stomping around the house.
But let's backtrack, shall we?
"Stylists, can I have your attention? It seems we have a little problem. All of you have been doublebooked."
The twin shortcut challenge was a cute idea, actually.
But leave it to LadyBird to provide the most over-the-top reaction to it. Honestly, that boy was made for screencaps.
Congrats to Nicole! We totally agreed with this win. She gave them both distinct - and very well executed - styles. But here's the bullshitty part (or one of them, anyway): we thought it was totally unfair to give someone immunity at this stage in the game for a shortcut challenge. That's a benefit so far beyond any other shortcut challenge winner that we thought it was pretty blatantly unfair.
Nothing against Nicole, of course. Like we said, she totally deserved the win. We just don't think she should have been guaranteed a finalist slot for it.
As for the elimination challenge...
This guy was a little douchey, wasn't he? And pardon us for pointing it out, but there was absolutely NOTHING "avant garde" about those pictures. A girl on a swing. A girl on a bike. A girl on a trampoline. We can't yawn hard enough.
Here's the second bullshit factor: Nicole darling, we love you, but this looked like ass (not to mention lame and cliched). It just didn't strike us as fair that she failed the penultimate challenge and yet she gets to go on to the finals.
Bullshit #3.
This looked AWFUL.
We have a lot of respect for Dee's skill, but it can't be denied that she constantly goes back to the same cut again and again. What exactly was "avant garde" about the same old boring simple bob? And why do such a flat, lifeless cut when you KNOW she's going to be jumping on a trampoline?
This, on the other hand, NOT bullshit.
Say what you will about Charlie (god knows we have), but despite his attempts to be the "villain," he is a consummate professional who really knows his shit.
This was really beautiful. It wasn't any more avant garde than the rest of them, but it was clearly the best out of the bunch.
And he was cute when he found out he was on his way.
MEGAbullshit. Was this fabulous and exciting and avant garde? No, of course not. But it was nowhere near as bad as the judges made it out to be.
And we're sorry, but how is it fair that only Daniel had to deal with the difficult element of water being added to the mix? Although, he did get a great line in, as usual:
"Apparently the Los Angeles Fire Department was available and they brought their hoses. He hosed this bitch down like she was on fire."
EXACTLY, LadyBird. How is that fair? None of the other stylists had to deal with that.
We can't deny that it doesn't look so hot, but man, did they ever stack the deck last night.
We are really gonna miss him and we think it sucks out loud that he's not in the finals. On the other hand, he should take comfort in the fact that he got the most emotional goodbye we've ever seen. Jaclyn was damn close to breaking down and sobbing, which we thought was utterly adorable. And when she called him a "true Texas gentleman?" Poodles, we fell OUT.
LadyBird, we luvya and you didn't deserve this.
[Screencaps: Tomandlorenzo.blogspot.com]
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