2009 Grammy Awards - Part 1

Well darling, the stars were out for the various Grammy-related activities this past week and you know what that means, don't you?

It's BITCHPANTS time!


Paula Abdul in Basil Soda Spring 2009



Jesus Christ, we needed a second cup of coffee before looking at that. There's so much wrong here that it's kind of hard to get a handle on the whole thing. First off, the length is all wrong for her as is the silhouette. Second, we like the shade of yellow but we're not sure it looks all that great against her coloring. Third...honestly, do we need to point it out? Her shoulder is being eaten by nanites! And finally, the "1968 prom" hair is DISASTROUS.

Paula, immediately FIRE whoever put this together for you. And when we say "fire," we mean, "set them on..."


Paula Abdul in Basil Soda Spring 2009 attending the Grammy Salute to Industry Icons



We don't love the dress but this is a huge step in the right direction. The silhouette and color look great on her. There's perhaps too much going on with this dress but we do like the print on the skirt. The bodice is just distracting and it makes her look like she's wedged into that dress. Shoes are fab.


Miley Cyrus in Roberto Cavalli Spring 2009



Lorenzo likes this dress (although he admits she can't quite pull it off) and Tom exclaimed "EW! God, NO!" upon first viewing it. The back is all cocktail waitress and the front looks like she put on her apron to go make pierogies in the church basement. The shoes are just okay.


Miley Cyrus in Heve Leger Fall 2008 attending the Grammy Salute to Industry Icons



Props for trying to do something a little sophisticated but again, she can't quite pull it off. Besides, it seems a little formal for the Grammys.


Maiysha in Carmen Webber (Yes, THAT Carmen Webber)



Sweet Jesus.

How is it that someone puts this on, looks at herself in the mirror and not only thinks it's appropriate to leave the house in, but that it's appropriate to be photographed in?

We will say that if the bottom was a skirt, we'd probably have no problem with this. Good job on the nipple coverage, though.


Giuliana Rancic in Rami Kashou Fall 2008 Final Collection



It's a sharp, eye-catching dress and for the most part it looks good on her. She had to go the sexy route and ruin the skirt, though. Congrats on your legs, honey but that doesn't give you free reign to ruin the line of a dress.

Hate the shoes.


Rihanna (pre-drama) in Gucci Spring 2009



She looks pretty damn fabulous. Beautiful print and the colors work really well on her. Lorenzo doesn't like the belt but Tom thinks it does look better with one, just not this one. Also, her girls look like they're suffocating. Still, the overall effect is enough to overcome any transgressions. The jewelry's nice but it's not what we would have chosen for this dress.


[Photos: WireImage/Getty Images/Style.com]