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Monday, December 11, 2006

Princess Morgan in the Land of Make Believe





We don't get it.


Seriously, we don't get how this is considered a bathing suit. It looks like your standard slut uniform: Skin tight, low cut top with a uterus skirt. Who wears something like this to go swimming?


Ah. Of course. Clearly, he was designing with the crazy in mind. How much you wanna bet she deliberately let one rip in his face?


Whenever they give Morgan the smokey eye, it only accentuates the sheer craziness underneath. She just looks a little too Baby Jane here, y'know? And poor Kevin has been cast in the Joan Crawford role. He looks like he's fearing for his life.


Actually, he's fearing for his garment. Kevin, stop being such a doormat. Everyone there knew it was a bad idea to let her go out wearing that thing. Even you knew it. So why did you let her go?


"mwah. I promise I'll be good, mommy and won't sit on any boys' laps. Can I have your credit card? And some rubbers?"

Now it's like an updated version of Carrie, with the crazy mom and the homicidal daughter.

"THEY'RE ALL GONNA LAUGH AT YOU...laugh at you...laugh at you...laugh at you..."


And while she didn't get drenched in pig's blood (dammit), she did wind up doing exactly what everyone thought she would: trashing the garment. Quel surprise.


"Ooops. HAHAHA."

It would be bad for two grown men to post their fantasies about hitting her and never stopping, wouldn't it?

Wouldn't it?


And then she had the nerve to be all attitudinal about it. Is she not aware of the cameras capturing her every move and utterance? Or do the cameramen just blend in with the talking unicorns and dancing fire hydrants and whatever else parades in front of her eyes?

See, we think Morgan isn't necessarily the walking personality disorder she appears to be. We think Morgan can't tell the difference between real people and whatever she's hallucinating at the moment, so she just goes with the assumption that everything's just a figment of her imagination and she only has to pay attention when she feels like it.

It makes sense, doesn't it? In order for her to understand that she was appearing on a reality show, someone would have had to sit her down and explain just what "reality" is. And honeys, we can't blame anyone for not succeeding in that endeavor.


[Screencaps: projectrungay.blgospot.com]


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