Lorenzo: First of all, I hate the hats --
Tom: I agree. They don't even look like hats. They look like fabric pinned to their heads.
Lorenzo: It's just way too haute couture -y. Too derivative of haute couture designers.
Tom: It smells like "wannabe." Anyway, I don't love the skirt - mainly because of the fabric - but the top is gorgeous.
Lorenzo: Despite the hat, I really like this look.
Lorenzo: I hate the hat.
Tom: We know.
Lorenzo: Fucking butterflies!
Tom: We KNOW. Let's just assume that we both hate the hats going forward. I think this looks very "old lady."
Lorenzo: The skirt especially.
Tom: The skirt looks like a slip. As for the top --
Lorenzo: I hate the trim on it.
Tom: Me too. Overall, I thought his color story was drab, but trying to dress it up with that ugly floral didn't help.
Lorenzo: I liked the jacket very much.
Tom: You DO?
Lorenzo: It's very well-structured. Don't you think?
Tom: Sure, but I think it's probably one of the MOST derivative pieces in the whole collection.
Lorenzo: I agree, but it's still pretty.
Tom: So are butterflies.
Lorenzo: You're a bitch.
Tom: I know, right? Anyway, I do like the doilies on the skirt but I don't like the fringe.
Tom: I love this.
Lorenzo: Me too.
Tom: I think we like this because it's the least "fussy" look in the whole collection. Simple and chic.
Lorenzo: I don't understand why he went in such an overdone direction for this collection. It's nothing like his work during the season. Anyway, I do like this one and I like where he positioned the doily.
Tom: Doilies done right.
Tom: Doilies done wrong. It looks like Christmas wrapping paper.
Lorenzo: The dress is nice.
Tom: Except for all that fussiness at the top.
Lorenzo: True, but the silhouette works. It's just all those freaking doilies!
Tom: Starting with the jacket, I liked it all except the Batman points on the shoulders and the cuffs on the sleeves.
Lorenzo: Agreed. And can I just say that the shoes were completely WRONG for this collection?
Tom: You just did. Hooker shoes with granny clothes. I'm getting dizzy thinking about it.
Tom: Let's just say that out loud: "crocheted bikini." Say it.
Lorenzo: It's not awful, but the bottom looks like a diaper.
Tom: Keeping with the granny clothes theme, then. Crocheted Depends.
Tom: FUG.
Lorenzo: Titscrepancy!
Tom: It looks like an elf costume from Lord of the Rings.
Lorenzo: I hate those sleeves.
Lorenzo: I loved this.
Tom: It moves beautifully. I just don't like the fabric.
Lorenzo: I disagree. I think this was one instance where the choice of the fabric worked.
Tom: I'm just not loving the colors. I don't like the mismatched straps either.
Lorenzo: That is just...the bottom is... wrong. Who would...?
Tom: You're speechless. I think she looks like a depressed Can Can girl.
Lorenzo: The skirt is just awful.
Tom: It might not have looked so bad if it wasn't sheer. Naah. You're right. It's just wrong.
Lorenzo: Sheer skirt with an asymmetrical ruffled hem. How many wrong things can we fit in one look?
Lorenzo: I don't have a problem with it.
Tom: The dress is fine. The FABRIC, however. It's just so ...Golden Girls. Having drinks on the lanai with Rose and Dorothy, that's what it is.
To sum it up, despite whatever good parts there were, the collection as a whole was so overwhelmingly derivative that we can't appreciate them. It felt a little calculated. Like if he put out something that looked like haute couture, the judges would spew all over it. Well, it worked for one of them, at least. How about that little crying jag? Was that not alternately hysterically funny and bizarrely uncomfortable at the same time?
[Photos: slice.ca]
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