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Friday, January 4, 2008

Twizzler Woman! The whole world is waiting for you!





Fighting for your rights! In your candy tights!

A Princess from a magical (Long) island, Twizzler Woman has been sent to the world of man(hattan) to show the world that emotions are for the weak. Raised by a society of strong-willed, yet emotionless women, TW disguises herself as fashion designer Jillian Prince in order to teach young women everywhere that they don't need love and they don't need men. They need clothes.


Oh, Kittens. There has been much sturm und drang in the RunGay household over Jillian's dress.


See, Lorenzo hates the dress. HATES it. Tom doesn't exactly love the dress, but he thinks it was a gutsy move to make it completely out of candy and, all things considered, it turned out remarkably well.


Before we get to that, would it kill this chick to actually let some emotions register on her face? She was apparently freaking out over her garment and yet her facial muscles barely moved and her voice remained monotone the entire time. Between her and VictorYA it's like they're pumping mood inhibitors into the workroom. You're on TV, bitches! Entertain us!

Anyway.

Look, it's not like it's some sort of ground-breaking, fashion-forward design or anything. In fact, if you put a cowboy hat on her, she'd look like she works in a rodeo.


But Tom can't help being impressed with how well it turned out, given her material choices.


Lorenzo's not as forgiving. He says it was her problem that she chose such ridiculous materials to begin with. If they'd been ordered to work only with candy, then this probably would have been a winner. As it is, the only reason the judges liked it was because it was made of candy, not because it was actually a nice-looking garment or anything.


It's difficult to assess her design decisions because using Twizzlers was the only design decision she made. After that, she really didn't have much leeway. Armor-like bustier? Check. Candy fringe? Check. We're done here.


Sure, it's well-executed, as far as that goes. But extensive use of fabric glue does not a designer make.


Seriously, you should have seen Lorenzo on the couch. The whole time he was "If those goddamn judges spew all over her for this piece of shit, I'm gonna scream." Well, they did and so did he. Face it, she's a judges' pet and she'd pretty much have to smear shit on her model to get them to hate her at this point.

Still, Tom maintains that she stuck to the spirit of the challenge and made something whimsical and one-of-a-kind. Was it a somewhat obvious design? Sure. But she's the only one who had the balls to not resort to simply ripping up pillows for her materials. Maybe she shouldn't have been in the top 3, but she certainly deserved to stay another week.

Just frikkin show some emotions every now and then, girl. Or we're gonna start calling you Ms. Spock.


[Photo: Barbara Nitke/bravotv.com - Screencaps: Project RunGay]


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