Virgins v. Vixens

They're back!

Darlings, please don't hate us. What with all the Project Runway blogging and the Mad Men blogging and the Glee blogging and the spring collections, we just couldn't find the time to sit down and spend the required couple of hours counting votes and looking for pictures for the next round. Forgive us?

For those of you just joining us, this is a competition pitting mega-famous actresses from the fifties and the sixties who embodied the two major archetypes of sex symbols for the period: the Virgin and the Vixen. Each "week" (yeah, right) we pit a famous virgin and/or a famous vixen up against another and the readers vote on which one wins. You can use whatever criteria you like to make your decision. We tend to frame it as if they're in an imaginary cage match, but most of the time the readers simply vote for their favorite. It was a tough competition and a lot of legendary ladies hit the mat and never got up again. We're in the finals now, but here's how the competition went down:

Janet Leigh vs. Kim Novak

Kim Novak vs. Leslie Caron

Leslie Caron vs. Gina Lollobrigida

Gina Lollobrigida vs. Jean Simmons

Gina Lollobrigida vs. Shirley MacLaine

Shirley MacLaine vs. Joan Collins

Shirley Maclaine vs. Brigitte Bardot

Jane Fonda vs. Julie Christie

Jane Fonda vs. Natalie Wood

Natalie Wood vs. Angie Dickinson

Natalie Wood vs. Debbie Reynolds

Debbie Reynolds vs. Julie Andrews

It was at this point, that we started with the big guns. Not that any of the previous ladies weren't big guns in their own right, but it was time to break out the virgins and/or vixens that have passed into legend and only need to be referred to by their first names.

Julie Andrews vs. Audrey Hepburn

Audrey Hepburn vs. Sophia Loren

Do you see how fickle you bitches are? Audrey Hepburn! Not making it to the finals! You guys are nuts. Granted, going up against Sophia was a pretty tall order, but that's why they're called the big guns.

Sophia Loren vs. Jayne Mansfield

Before we broke out the REALLY big guns, it was time to bring back the one competitor who managed to beat three bitches in a row. Hence:

Sophia Loren vs. Shirley MacLaine.

Yow. Now that's a toughie. Two legendary ladies with very different styles (and a penchant for playing hookers). Which one was still standing after the votes were counted? Well, we'll tell ya, it was a very close race, but in the end, only one hooker can make it out of the ring alive.

We are sad to inform you that...

SHIRLEY MACLAINE IS DEAD.

And it's all your fault! But don't worry. She has a tendency to not stay dead long.

Anyway, here it is; the finals of the Virgins vs. Vixens showdowns. Sophia hoists up her tits and re-enters the ring to take on the woman who embodied virginity more than any other actress of the period (and if you believe the stories, pulled the wool over the eyes of the public while doing it). These two ladies couldn't be more different and yet in their day, they were two of the biggest box office draws around.

MISS SOPHIA LOREN

takes on...

MISS DORIS DAY, BITCHES!

The quintessential vixen up against the quintessential virgin. Cast your votes now. One of these ladies is going DOWN! And not in the good way!

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