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Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Where the Boys Are.

It's an all-sausage post, bitches!

Epperson:

Okay, is it just us? Easy Sewer here barely spoke a word the entire episode and yet we sat there thinking "He's so cool. Let's go hang out with him and be best friends." Of course, if we were to hang out with him...

Model: Erica Milde

...we'd have to avoid the topic of this dress.

Which isn't to say it's a bad dress, just totally wrong for the challenge. When one thinks "red carpet," one doesn't normally think "heavy and funereal."

Don't get us wrong, there are some interesting details here (like the pleat in the skirt and collar treatment and the criss-crossing over the bust), and it's certainly executed well.

But it's a lot of elements for one dress, especially a red carpet dress, and the overall effect is heavy, stiff and overdone. Plus, the length just kills us. Even with the added dingy-looking tulle on the bottom (which is another element to add to the pile), the dress stops at a weird point.

We definitely think he's got the chops to make it far, but this dress wasn't all that great. We suspect he was working too far outside his milieu. He doesn't strike us as a red carpet kinda designer.

Logan:


"I'm definitely different than a normal fashion designer. I don't know, I'm more of a guy's guy, I guess."

Okay, let's get this out of the way. If Logan continues to say silly shit like this, rest assured, we are going to make fun of him for it. For those of you who may not be familiar with this particular trope and might get a little bent out of shape over it (which tends to happen): we are NOT making any claims about his sexuality. We are laughing because fashion design is, in no one's opinion, a manly man kind of profession and when (presumably) straight guys appear on this show, there's a little bit of defensiveness coming off them when they rush to assert their masculine bona fides. Whether it's the sweaty, frantic "I have a wife and children!" of a Joe Faris, the forced shrugging and "Heidi is hot!" of a Kevin Christiana, or here, the "Vroom! Vroom! Cars!" of guys-guy Logan, that reversal that comes when a straight man works in a field dominated by gay men and women is FUNNY.

See what you bitches made us do? You made us EXPLAIN a JOKE. Don't EVER do that again.

Model: Fatma Dabo

Pfft. Straight boy dress.

Before we get to the criticisms, we have to say that the zipper was an interesting idea. He just didn't take it far enough. What's the point of incorporating a zipper in the design like that and then zipping it up like it's cold out? Had he unzipped it further and maybe used the open zipper to create some sort of fold or structure to the bust, that could have been interesting. As it is, he added an interesting element and then did everything he could to disguise that it was there at all.

Aside from that, the dress is just boring, and worse,

...it was a wrinkled mess. Perhaps using a steamer isn't considered manly or something.

Malvin:

"No one can really describes the type of garments I do. There's not a vocabulary for them yet."

Oh, save us.

This will be a terrible struggle for us, but let's see if we can somehow describe this indescribable garment:

Model: Valerie Roy

"Dress."

That about sums it up, Malvin.

"Overthought dress."

How are we doing so far, Malvin? Have we "found the vocabulary" yet?

"Overthought dress with too many elements, poorly executed in the wrong kind of fabric, making it inappropriate for a carpet of any color, let alone a red one." There. We think we've stumbled upon a method of describing your clothes.

Okay, putting aside the bitchery for a moment, it's an interesting design. He just needs to get a little over himself and produce a flawless garment to impress the judges.

Nicolas:

"Basically, I'm known in New York as the feather prince."

By whom? We want names, Pocahontas.

Model: Matar Cohen

Y'know, we, much like the judges, passed right over this dress in our considerations, but we have to say...

It's a pretty decent dress. It's not flawless, mind you, but those embellishments on the front are interesting and fairly well done, considering the time constraints.

The only real problem is that it really isn't fitted all that well to the model. If he had pulled off a flawless fit, we think the judges would have definitely taken more notice of it. We also think if he'd gone gown-length it would have served the design well. Although to be fair...

One judge clearly responded well to the short skirt.

Tim Gunn's Workroom Critique:








[Photos: Mike Yarish/myLifetime.com
- Videos: myLifetime.com - Screencaps: Projectrungay.blogspot.com]


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